Thursday, June 23, 2011

Fiance leaving me after 4 years?

I came home from a business trip to my fiance. We've been together for 4 years, living together for 3 and 1/2 years and got engaged 7 months ago. We always had the same goals: work on our career, buy a nice house on the water, not have kids. Now, all the sudden, he wants to have kids and I still don't. He's leaving, just like that. He comes from a close family and says that he probably always wanted kids in the back of his mind. My family is not close and I just have never wanted kids. I'm shocked, hurt, pissed, sad. Wish he could've been honest from the beginning (I think he lied to himself more than me). How do I move on from this? I thought I was done; settled. Now, I'm 30 with a great career and my same dreams and no one to build them with. I'll be okay. Right now it just seems pointless. Starting over sucks. Any advice would be appreciated. Please be gentle, my emotions are haywire!!

Answer on Fiance leaving me after 4 years?

My heart goes out to you. I know it's tough being in an unplanned situation like this.

For myself, I like to think it could have been worse. Luckily, you found out his true intentions before you tied that knot. That could have gotten nasty; both emotionally and financially.

You can still keep your dreams--never let them fade. Just know that he wasn't the one to build them with. There is someone out there willing to give it their all.

You will love again--though it may take time.

Never blame yourself, you were upfront and honest about what you wanted out of life. He wasn't honest with you, or himself.