Saturday, October 7, 2000

Im torn between my fiance and my father!! What do i do, Advice Needed?

Im 24 and met my fiance 2yrs ago, We became engaged 6 months after meeting, He is 33 and the craziest, funniest most romantic man i've ever met, I love him so much. He is a musician & can be a very wild guy &- i only found out recently- smokes pot, His parents are divorced. I was born & raised in Italy but moved to the US two & a half years ago and then i met my fiance & fell head over heels for him. I come from a very close wealthy family and im the only girl of 4 older brothers, My father has always been very protective of me, He also has a very strong personality, can be very arrogant, you could also call him obnoxious & very outspoken as he is not afraid to say what he really feels. Growing up he never approved of my boyfriends and they we're terrified to get on his bad side, Growing up i was a huge daddy's girl, My mother always told me that he was like that because i am the apple of his eye & that to him no man would ever be good enough for me. My father met my fiance when we went back to Italy to visit 3 months ago and my dad hated him, There was tension between them, He told me he felt i am too young & he didn't know why i wanted to marry him & that i would be better off coming back to Italy and marry someone from my homeland etc. When i also told him that my fiance and i decided that we want to elope somewhere to marry he disapproved strongly saying i deserve a big wedding in Italy, That he will pay for & that he deserves the honour of walking 'his little girl' down the aisle. I never thought i wanted that kind of wedding until i seen how much it meant to my whole family. When i told my fiance he got angry with me saying im letting others influence me about a day that should be just about us, saying that my father just wants him out of the picture, He is still a bit pissed off with me but now i feel torn. I understand this may seem stupid to others but i don't know what to do. Any advice?

Answer on Im torn between my fiance and my father!! What do i do, Advice Needed?

Just for a moment omit what both your father and your fiance want... what do you want?

Then tell both of them what it is you want but work with your fiance to come up with what you both could enjoy.

hope that help, congrats!